Rules of Love, 2nd edition
A Personal Code for Happier, More Fulfilling Relationships
By Richard Templar
June 2013
Pearson Education
Distributed by the Trans-Atlantic Publications
ISBN: 9781447929505
237 Pages
$22.50 Paper original
Strong, loving relationships are what life’s all about. And some people are really good at it.
They find a partner who makes them happy and they seem to know instinctively how to handle tricky times and keep the relationship fresh and rewarding.
They make friends easily and have lasting relationships that stand the test of time. They are the lynchpin of a strong supportive family. They make it look effortless. Yet for most of us it just isn’t that straightforward. Love may be a basic human instinct, but sharing your life with other people isn’t always easy.
Is there something these people know that we don’t? Is there something we can all benefit from? The answer is a resounding yes. They know The Rules of Love.
The Rules of Love are a set of guiding principles that will help form and sustain strong, enduring and ultimately life enhancing relationships.
This new edition includes 7 brand new rules for even happier and more fulfilling relationships. You’ll feel the benefits – and so will everybody around you.
Contents:
Introduction
Rules for Finding Love
1 Be yourself
2 Get over it before you get on with it
3 You won’t be happy with a partner until you can be happy on your own
4 You’ll know them when you meet them
5 Choose someone who makes you laugh
6 Being less than a hundred percent attractive is a great filter
7 Don’t keep making the same mistakes
8 Certain people are off limits (you know who they are)
9 You can’t change people
10 Relationships aren’t about sex
11 Get to know someone through all the seasons before making any major decisions
12 Don’t stay with someone who doesn’t care
13 If you can’t trust them, you haven’t got a relationship
14 Be honest (while you still have the chance)
15 Don’t play games
16 Don’t tar new partners with old brushes
17 Check you both have the same shared goals
18 You can’t make someone love you
19 Be cruel to be kind
Relationship Rules
20 Be nice
21 Be together because you want to, not because you need to
22 Allow your partner the space to be themselves
23 Look to your own faults
24 Be honourable
25 Put each other first
26 Recognize the signs
27 Be a hero – or a heroine
28 Accept the differences, embrace what you have in common
29 Don’t belittle your partner
30 You want to do what?
31 Let not the sun go down upon your wrath
32 Be the first to say sorry
33 Let them have the last word
34 Houston, we have a problem
35 Don’t put them on a pedestal and expect them to stay there
36 Know when to listen and when to act
37 Never stop trying to be attractive
38 If you can say something nice, do
39 Don’t try to be their parent
40 Be part of their life
41 If little things annoy you, say so – with humour
42 Go that extra step in trying to please them
43 Make sure your partner is always pleased to see you
44 Don’t dump responsibility on your partner
45 Let them know if you don’t like their friends
46 Jealousy is your stuff, not theirs
47 Your partner is more important than your kids
48 Make time for romance
49 Have a passion for your life together
50 Share the workload
51 Trust the other one to do the job
52 Don’t be a nag
53 Make sure your love making is making love
54 Don’t control them
55 Listen to what they’re not saying
56 Most everyday arguments are about something else
57 Respect privacy
58 Treat your partner better than your best friend
59 Don’t be offended if they want some space
60 Men like flowers too
61 Keep your finances separate
62 Contentment is a high aim
63 Be generous to each other financially
64 You make a choice every day
65 Don’t be a martyr
66 Stop sniping – someone has to
67 You don’t both have to have the same rules
68 Do it their way if it matters to them
69 Put yourself in their shoes
70 In-laws are part of the package
71 Keep talking
Rules for Parting
72 Listen to your own internal voice
73 Recognize that it takes two
74 Keep the moral high ground
75 Don’t keep raking it over
76 Leave the kids out of it
Family Rules
77 Don’t blame your parents
78 Don’t let your parents control your feelings
79 Your children come before you
80 Nothing is worth falling out over
81 Treat them right, no matter how they treat you
82 There are no circumstances in which it is ever acceptable to say 'I told you so'
83 Don’t pressurize your family just because you can
84 Never be too busy for loved ones
85 Your children need to fall out with you to leave home
86 They don’t have to be the same as you
87 There’s always stuff with siblings
88 Let go of your role
Friendship Rules
89 There are no rules
90 Your best friend was once a stranger
91 Only have people in your life who, on balance, make it better not worse
92 If you’re going to be a friend, be a good friend
93 Forgive
94 Never give advice
95 Don't make other people uncomfortable
96 Find friends who love the truth
97 Never lend money unless you’re prepared to write it off
98 If you don’t like their partner, tough
99 When one finger points forwards, three point back
100 Friendships change
101 Know when to let go
102 Bitterness helps no one
Rules for Everyone
103 People are more important than things
104 Guilt is a selfish emotion
105 Love equals time
106 The more you put out, the more you get back
107 Other people are where it’s at
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